The things I learned from college

I’ve seen several of these kinds of list. I didn’t see anything I related to, but knowing that everyone has extremely different experiences, I wanted to write this in hopes that I provide a different perspective.

Here’s my list:

  1. There are stupid questions, ask them any way.
  2. It’s normal for there to be no “normal.”
  3. It’s okay to have only a few close friends… or a ton.
  4. You don’t have to party to have a good time in college, that’s okay too.
  5. There are times when you ace a test with studying a bit
  6. There are time when you gave it all you got, and you didn’t get the result you deserved.
  7. Not all friends make perfect roommates.
  8. Not all roommates will be perfect friends.
  9. Always go with your gut.
  10. Be open to trying new things.
  11. Books over boys
  12. Best friends over boys
  13. Basically most things over boys
  14. Coming home is good.
  15. When you visit home, you never study. Prepare accordingly.
  16. Plan-castinating is key.
  17. Calendars are super important.
  18. Private school is not worth the hype.
  19. Don’t just do something because of someone else.
  20. Microwavable mac and cheese can be brunt.
  21. Soak in every moment.
  22. There are time to speak up.
  23. There are also times to shut up.
  24. Actively choose to be happy.
  25. You don’t choose how people make you feel, but you can choose to not let it define you. Be a duck, let the water roll off of you!
  26. Don’t judge what you don’t understand.
  27. Be open to everyone. Love everyone.
  28. Give second chances, third chances, forth chances.
  29. Different people act differently around different people.
  30. It’s okay to ask for help.
  31. Don’t ever be afraid of hearing a “no.”
  32. Life is too short to care what people think.
  33. You’ll never please everyone, so just please yourself.
  34. Don’t let any one see you sweat.
  35. Check Rate My Professor, before you register for classes. (But also remember #29, that also applies with teachers with classes)
  36. Dreams change as people grow.
  37. Friends feel like they are walking through a revolving door.
  38. Time never will stand still, push through the bad and enjoy the good.
  39. “Advisors” don’t always have the best advice, but they do come in handy.
  40. You will get screwed over, many times.
  41. Nothing is that worth holding a grudge over.
  42. You know who what type of person you are. If you’re not a morning person, avoid 8 am classes like the plague.
  43. Confidence is the key to almost anything.
  44. Find a system that works for you and live by it.
  45. If you’re not completely happy where you are, look for a place you will be.
  46. Group projects are the worst. Online group project is even worse.
  47. If you need extra credit, ask for it.  (Refer to #30 and #31 if you’re still not sure)
  48. Nobody quite knows your situation like you.
  49. Comparison is the true killer of happiness.
  50. Find the good in everyone you meet.

If there’s something on the list you think that I missed, please comment below and let me know! What was/is your college experience like?

-kas

I got rejected from my dream school

In the 8th grade my English teacher, Mrs. Hecker, gave us a project. She wanted us to research what we wanted to be and how we plan to get there. I remember writing a letter of protest. In it, I wrote about how I thought could never figure this out; I was too young, I barely knew what I wanted for dinner let alone know what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. But eventually I came to a decision: I wanted to go to Texas State and become a child life specialist (so I could practice play therapy.)

Then came senior year of high school I applied to two schools, Texas State University and the University of Mary Hardin-Baylor. One was my dream school, and one I just applied because my best friend was thinking about going there. Soon after sending in my application I got a response from UMHB, I got in. But Texas State took longer and after what seemed like forever, I got an answer. It was a letter and it said “Dear Kristan, we regret to inform you…” and I dropped it. I couldn’t believe what I just read. I mean you hear about people getting rejected, but those are kids who flunk out of school or who applied to super competitive schools that were way out of there league, like Harvard. But me? I did well in school. I mean, not perfect but not awful either. I spent a solid week just wallowing in my sadness, rarely leaving my bed. Why didn’t I get in? Was I not good enough? I thought I had the scores, the hours, the grades. Where did I get it wrong? If they didn’t accept me, who would? But someone did.

I ended up spending my freshmen year at the University of Mary Hardin-Baylor, and towards January I started to think of leaving. By the end of February my mind was made, I had to go. Money, time, quality of living all became a factor in leaving one school and possibly choosing another. Some schools came automatically to mind, St. Ed’s, Concordia, UNT, … and Texas State.

The idea of applying to the school that had already rejected me once, terrified me to my core. Everyone said that I’d get in easily, no sweat. But that’s what I thought last time, what’s different now? What would I do this time if I didn’t get in? Last time the rejection killed me, could I be strong enough to take that again? Every single application I ever sent in, my mom said a simple prayer “God, let all the doors that need to be opened, open. Let all the doors that need to be shut, shut.” By some struck of grace, I got in. My computer said “admit to institution,” rather than the dreaded “decision made.” I was absolutely ecstatic, I was yelling on the phone with my best friend. I woke up my parents at 3 in the morning. I couldn’t believe it. I can’t describe the feeling of being on the other side of my biggest fear, it was joy. Pure joy. I got in. To top it off, I got accepted all the schools that I applied to that semester which was pretty sweet!

I’m not writing this to tell you, that it will work out if you try again. I’m not telling you that I made it through, so you can too. Maybe you get that from this… and that’s great. But the real message of this is that God’s (or fate’s if you don’t believe in God) timing is always perfect.

Texas State wouldn’t have been right for me the first go around, I could have survived. But it would have been a long and tiring battle. UMHB was the perfect fit for me then but, now I’m in the new best place for me to be. Each stumble, set back, trial, and tribulation has a purpose. Just because one person at some institution tells you “no,” that’s not what defines you. What you are defined as is up to you, you can let this stumble define you or you can fight back. Don’t let your failure knock you down. You’re better than that. Cry, yes, cry your heart out. But once you’re done, dust yourself off and be ready to give the world all you got. You have a purpose on this earth. You were created for something great. You’ll find your place in this world, it might take longer than you hoped. But when you get there, I promise you it’ll be so worth it. It’s not always the journey that counts, it’s the destination.

You will make it.

Staying sober in college

People of often refer to college as the best moments of your life. Moments that often include a red cup and copious amounts of alcohol. I haven’t really done that. And for a while when people asked why I didn’t, I blamed it on going to a small private Christian university.

But in all honesty, I never partied because it wasn’t something I ever wanted to seek out. I am huge introvert that grew up in an alcohol barren home. So parties just didn’t sound fun. People being sloppy, doing things they don’t remember or will regret in the morning, just wasn’t something I had the desire of experiencing.

That doesn’t that I am completely in the dark about alcohol, I have other family members, friends, and even some of my previous roommates who drink, I been to bars, seen drunk people, interacted with them, and received drunk calls and texts.

People wonder why don’t I want to drink yet? Am I brainwashed into thinking alcohol is bad? Am I scared of alcohol? I’m not scared of alcohol, I just don’t want to drink. It isn’t some big long drawn out reason, I just don’t want to. People think it’s an idea my parents force on me, but they never did. Yeah, they don’t drink so they wouldn’t cheering me on as I did a keg stand or anything. But the beauty of my relationship with my parents is that if I were to call them and say I was drunk and needed a ride they wouldn’t lecture me saying drinking is bad. They don’t care if I drink or if I don’t. They just want me to be safe.  I don’t drink because I just don’t want to. It’s not my kind of fun, I find fun in the little things, binge watching stuff on Netflix, reading a good book, writing my blog, talking with my friends.  

Don’t get wrong I get how it could be a lot of fun. I get how people enjoy escaping reality and seeking some relief. That’s great for them, it’s just not my cup of tea…. (ohhh, but I really like tea)

So do you just not see yourself ever getting married?

Today, I was on the phone with my cousin, who I love so so much and he asked me the most famous question: “is there any new guys on the horizon?” My answer was my typical “nope. Not really looking for one either.” People think because college is where most people meet their spouses, that I should be actively searching for mine.

So when I answered no, my cousin asked “so do you just not see yourself ever getting married?” Yes, I see myself getting married. I am a hopeless romantic. I want that sweet banter I see between my parents, or just a nice person to hang out with ’til I drop dead like Luke and Lorelai.

Lorelai Gilmore love

I have a cheesy Pinterest board with all my fake wedding dreams. I know I want a tea-length dress, and I want my colors to be purple and some shade of blue. I know that if I were to be proposed to by my dream man tomorrow, I’d wait until at least April of 2018 to get married because Natalie would be back from her mission, settle into RM life, and finished with BYU for the summer (that way should could be my maid of honor, obviously!)

But I am not actively searching high and low for my future husband, and quite frankly I haven’t been for the past couple of years (blog post circa September of 2014.) I feel like it is called falling in love for a reason. You can’t force yourself into love, you just fall. Sometimes, I feel that kids my age are just looking and looking to find that right person that it ultimately consumes them and eventually they just settle. I’m not about that.

I have big dreams and right now, my priorities aren’t boys. Guys will come and go, but right now I have the opportunity to do something that not everyone can and that is go to college. I plan on taking full advantage of this gift of education. So school will always be first, boys will always behind it.

That does not mean that if I do meet some super chill dude I won’t date him. Of course, I’ll date him.. I have had relationships since my blog post in 2014. It just means I’m not on the search from him. Prince Charming will come when he comes but until then, I’m going to put all my energy in school and everything else will have to follow.
-kas

My Goodbye to UMHB

Dear Mary Hardin-Baylor,

Typically when ever I heard those three words they were about to begin a public group recitation of  the school song. I’d pretend that I know it, because to be completely honest, I don’t. There’s just so many adjectives. So I just stand there with my “C” and mouth the words I did know.

Leaving UMHB is a bittersweet mix of emotions, I never imagined transferring but then again I never imagined to be here. Now, here I am sitting in a room filled with barren walls and boxes filled with all my belongings and my dreams. Where am I headed? home.

Home was so good. I am so excited to be home. Being with my momma and pops, it’ll be good. For the past five years all I wanted to do is go Texas State University for psychology. The stars didn’t align just right so I wound up at a place I never expect, but it was good.

Belton was an adventure. Coming here, I knew no one. For someone with social anxiety, that’s a nightmare. Coming to UMHB was a big challenge, I learned a lot about myself.

I learned that I can do things I never thought I could. I’ve learned that I doubt myself way too much. I’ve learned that I can make friends without relying on others. I’ve learned that can take care of myself. I’ve learned that even if I am loud mouthed, I sometimes struggles to tell others when I am upset with something that they do. I’ve learned I’m super shy sometimes. I’ve learned that the relationship I have with my God is based on my ability to worship Him full out, hands raised, jumping, dancing, without a care in the world knowing He has everything taken care of. I’ve learned that my belief in Christ is something that is genuine, never forced. I’ve learned that I have a really open mind and I love those that others say that they could never. I’ve learned that I can bite my tongue. I’ve learned that even when people say I’m “too white” to be Mexican, I know who I am. I’ve learned to love her, beyond what physical or what not. Just love who I am. I love the person I see when I look at the mirror.

I leave here with more than I came here with. Yes, materialistically speaking. I am a girl with a huggge dorm room after all. But I also leave with so much more. I leave with all these things I’ve learned. I leave with self-confidence. I leave with my connections, my bosses. They really shaped me as a person and an employee. I leave with the things I love, with my friendships. My sassy squad. Gosh, I love them. I have met some of the most amazing people a girl could ever imagine having in her life. I leave with a full heart and a mind full of dreams.

Leaving Belton is more sad than I anticipated. No, Belton never became my “home.” But Belton has made a special place in my heart. This campus, this gorgeous campus and the gorgeous people I’ve met are what makes saying good bye to this place a little bit harder. Before I came to the University of Mary Hardin-Baylor, Belton wasn’t even in my mental map of Texas. Now, it’s a place that could never be taken off. It’s made its imprint on me and I hope in some way, I’ve made my imprint on it, too.

So now, I start my journey as a Bobcat, but I know I’m a Crusader Forever.

your truly,

Kristan A. Saucedo

ps- to the new Communications and Special Projects student worker, yes, you save this. It goes in the folder labelled “Blogs.” Sorry for giving you more work. You’ll love your bosses and the yearbook nerds, I know I do.

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